
SilverSingles or Match may seem like the obvious options for older singles — but many singles in their fifties and sixties are finding success on millennial swiping apps like Bumble. Here’s what to know about each.
Welcome to the no bullshitting age of dating.
Dating at any age is awkward, scary, and often, a pain in the ass. True, being in the over-60 group may mean that more people your age are already off the market — but online dating can prove that the mature dating pool isn’t dismal, even if your local one is.
It’s quite normal to feel hesitant about making the jump to online dating. Finding a dating site that feels comfortable and natural is intimidating at any age. 20 and 30-somethings have a hell of a time finding a dating app that works for them — there are almost too many options. Late baby boomers (and early Gen X-ers) have a more straightforward approach.
SEE ALSO: For finding a serious relationship, these dating sites are the best
Youth has another disadvantage that older singles may not have considered: Many people in their 20s and 30s just aren’t ready to settle down. Developing a crush on someone is more likely to end with an awkward “situation-ship” rather than something serious. Most 60+ folks have been figuring this whole “love” thing out for longer than millennials have been alive. With life experience and possible previous marriages under your belt, you know the red flags and you know what you want.
EliteSingle’s senior dating blog notes that most older individuals realize that life is just too short to play games, and that older people take dating much more seriously than they did 40 years ago. Who cares if this person isn’t your first (or second, or third) love? The potential for lasting love is what matters. Like one person in the Reddit thread datingoverfifty suggests, if you want commitment, a site with a high barrier to entry — like eharmony, Match, or Elite Singles — could help to weed out people who aren’t about to pay a high monthly price just to mess around.
Despite the added layer of seriousness, butterflies are still in your cards. You’ll get giddy like a teenager, wait for them call and do a happy dance when they do, and first kisses will be just as tingly. And if you want to skip the heavy, emotional stuff all together, just say that in your bio. There are plenty of other mature singles who are looking for anything from a casual hookup partner to a traveling companion or workout buddy. Many singles in their 50s and 60s have found more success (due to the sheer number of people) on apps with heavy millennial influence, like monster swiping app Tinder and Bumble — where women aren’t bombarded by messages from men.
Some websites are for all ages with a senior option, and some sites are specifically for people over 50. All of the sites have free memberships, but to get the real in-depth features (like unlimited messaging or seeing photos), you’ll probably need a paid account.
Here are the best dating sites for seniors in 2021:
eharmony
Find the mushy, long-term love you crave on this classic site that’s been refreshed to keep up with the times.-
Free version:
Yes -
Six months of Premium:
$59.50/month -
One year of Premium:
$35.90/month -
Two years of Premium:
$25.90/month
The approach has been streamlined and modernized over the years, but eharmony is still so confident in its knack for finding compatibility that you’ll get three months for free if you don’t find love within the first three months. That doesn’t necessarily guarantee that you’ll be walking down the aisle in that time, but it does promise to narrow your options to singles who want to experience the milestones that come with commitment — like meeting family.
What was once a doozy of a sign-up process is now short and sweet, shedding the religious veil from years ago. The questionnaire covers 32 dimensions (up from 29 of what makes a happy relationship. This is a site where you can really pin down what a past relationship may have been missing, or highlight emotional needs that aren’t up for debate. Instead of blatantly asking if you get mad easily or if you’re emotionally stable, eharmony may ask how you handle apologizing after a fight or if a certain action would piss you off. These hypotheticals draw more natural responses, and a few other fun ones are thrown in to cover hobbies and other factors that make good ice breakers.
SilverSingles
SilverSingles has an extensive questionnaire at signup that ensures you find matches who are truly compatible.-
Free version:
Yes -
3 Months:
$49.95 -
6 Months:
$37.95 -
12 Months:
$27.95
A sister site to EliteSingles, SilverSingles uses the same intense compatibility system that EliteSingles does, bringing in the popular big five personality traits to assess five levels of your being: openness to experience, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism. If you’ve heard of Senior Singles Meet in the past, SilverSingles is that same site with a rebrand — so they’ve actually been working on mastering the five factor model in tandem with senior dating for about two decades. Because SilverSingles wants to ensure that your next relationship lasts, the sign-up process and questionnaires will take some time. AskMen suggests to grab a glass of scotch and sit down for this one. But hey, if having every tiny part of your personality assessed is what it takes to find the happily ever after you’ve been waiting for, an hour of your time is totally worth it. SilverSingles will only send you five matches a day, and you can’t search through a pool of people — but this will force you to seriously consider if you can see yourself with these people.
LSMJIMMY, who found the “right one” on SilverSingles in 2020, gave this advice on Reddit: “I put up 18 pictures and changed the primary picture every few days to keep it fresh. I also edited or changed the responses to the questions about once per week. I spelled out what I DID NOT want…I am not a couch potato and love to travel fish, boat, ride motorcycles, hotrods, etc, etc. That cleans out the “sit and knit” crowd and I mentioned that I am “actively romantic” which cleans out the ladies that have lost the Zest for Life, if you know what I mean. I don’t have time to drag this dating thing out, so I think it helped by getting what Who I am and want I am looking for on the table early.”
Match
Find your soulmate without the pressure on Match, whose 50+ group is its fastest growing demographic.-
Free version:
Yes -
One month of Premium:
$35.99 -
Three months of Premium:
$19.99/month -
Six months of Premium:
$17.99/month -
One year of Premium:
$15.99/month
One of Match’s shining points of consistency over the years is its well-populated but balanced user base. There’s a near-even split between men and women, users who don’t have kids and users who do have kids, and a pretty stacked feed of people to match with even if you’re looking for love in a less-populated area. The 50+ age group is the site’s fastest-growing demographic.
Match (no more “.com”) has totally reconstructed its questionnaire to be less of a tedious interrogation and more of a conversational probe into how you’d react to realistic situations — both with a partner and, say, a neighbor who needs help at 3. a.m. The dive into your values and daily habits (plus the ability to mark traits that are deal breakers) ensures that Match sets you up with someone whose ideal lifestyle matches yours.
AskMatch, a free dating advice service that lets you pick the brain of a dating coach, can be thanked for a wave of positive reviews on the App Store. In 2020, Match launched Vibe Check, a social distancing-era video call feature that aims to give matches the closest thing to a first date. (It’s also a smart way to ensure that someone is who they say they are.) Users can also talk to their Top Picks without a paid subscription — a rare freebie that folks still on the fence will appreciate.
EliteSingles
If a past relationship ended due to mismatched monetary or work habits, EliteSingles lets you buckle down.-
Free version :
Yes -
Three months of Premium:
$69.95/month -
Six months of Premium:
$53.95/month -
One year of Premium:
$35.95/month
This is not a place for the young and the restless — and could add a layer of maturity if you need someone who’s in the same place in life. 82% of members are college graduates, and many are between 33 and 50. (Users outside that range are more likely to be older than younger.) EliteSingles’ steep monthly prices (sometimes too steep) help to carve out a pool of established folks with a disposable income.
Rather than digging through an endless heap of profiles, EliteSingles attempts to match you through the Five Factor Personality Test. 29 algorithms are analyzed to find people who complement your attachment style, selfishness, and more stuff that you should try to be honest about. Boring sections are broken up by fun ones like “Do you like sleeping with the window open?” and “Which of these foods would you like the best?” A lot of the questions are deep to the point of being cliché, but being honest about mushy stuff or baggage matters, too.
Though you can technically filter potential matches by profession (for example, a teacher looking to date another teacher), it’s difficult for any dating site to track down every single person lying about their job or how much money they make.
Bumble
Women make the first move, so it’s great for ladies tired of being bombarded by brazen guys.-
Free version:
Yes -
One week of Boost:
$9.99 -
One month of Boost:
$24.99 -
Three months of Boost:
$16.66/month -
Six months of Boost:
$13.33/month -
Lifetime Boost:
$119.99
It pushes some women out of their comfort zone, but like Tinder, you’ll at least know that someone also swiped right on you before making a move. It also takes the pressure off of men who may be rusty and uncomfortable with starting the conversation every time. (For same-sex matches, either party can start things off.) Matches expire after 24 hours so you can’t agonize over that opening line for too long, and your match list won’t be filled with people you forgot you matched with 57 weeks ago.
You’ll see pictures and short bios of potential matches in your area and can swipe depending on whether you’re interested. Bumble also offers a BFF feature to find strictly platonic friends and a LinkedIn-ish networking feature called Bizz in attempts to remind everyone that it’s not just a hookup app.
Zoosk
Super quick setup for those looking to peruse options without the pressure of going on a date.-
Free version:
Yes -
One month:
$29.95 -
Three months:
$19.98/month -
One year:
$12.49/month
Creating a profile is basically instantaneous with three short steps: Upload a photo, enter your location, and answer a few basic “about me” questions like education level, religion, if you have children, etc. and bam — you’re ready to start browsing without a wait. Since it’s so speedy and slightly surface level, Zoosk works for those individuals looking for a casual fling.
Similar to the way Facebook shows you posts it thinks you’ll enjoy based on posts you’ve liked or interacted with in the past, Zoosk uses its behavioral SmartPick algorithm to fill your pool with users it thinks you’ll like based on profiles you’ve clicked on in the past. Zoosk will then ask how you felt about the profiles they recommended: If you liked who they suggested, select yes. If you’re looking for something different, select no. (There’s a maybe option, too.) Zoosk will automatically adapt and use this information the next time it suggests a profile for you to speed up the process and give better recommendations in the future.
Zoosk also offers an advice blog with 20+ pages of online and offline dating advice.
OurTime
You can keep an OurTime profile in your back pocket, but don’t make this your go-to dating site.-
Free version:
Yes -
One month:
$29.99 -
Three months:
$23.33/month -
Six months:
$14.99/month
App Store reviews mention poor design, horrible customer service experiences, and bad user experience. The site has received an onslaught of negative feedback on review platform Sitejabber, with more instances of shoddy user functionality (like having a hard time un-liking a profile that was liked accidentally) as well as people getting scammed out of their money by other users and bots.
Setup is straightforward. You complete a thorough questionnaire, customize your profile, and add photos (you can even upload them straight from Facebook). A profile with no photos is a dead giveaway that something is fishy — so we’d suggest uploading a lot so that the other genuine users on the site know that you’re the real deal. Upgrading to a paid account opens the door to more on-site messaging, virtual gifts, or live chat. OurTime does a pretty decent job at giving users ways to communicate effectively — in ways other than texting 24/7 like the younger crowd may prefer.
In times not plagued by coronavirus, OurTime also hosts local events for singles to meet in person.